


Absence de gâteau [Absence of cake]

by ShiJisatsu



Category: Original Work
Genre: BL, Boys In Love, Love, M/M, Romance, School, Tragedy, Yaoi, daily life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-12 01:22:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28627197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShiJisatsu/pseuds/ShiJisatsu
Summary: Tsutomu has never opened his heart to another person, until he met Kishō, a boy totally opposed to him who seeks a way to change his perspective. Together they must face events that will jeopardize their confidence.
Relationships: Kishou x Tsutomu





	1. Introduction

_How do you qualify an empty being among so many individuals? Living in such a way where your personality does not matter, since your social status can simply destroy you without you saying a word._

When talking about high school, normally a stage full of romances and stories full of feelings is assimilated that end up catching you and improving you as a person, a beauty that makes you be radiant for love, or a rejection story where you are illuminated by the searchlight of the tragedy that hatched a magnificent version, the fruit of pain.

At the beginning you can choose your own path, and as you get closer to the final goal, the path becomes so narrow that you have no choice but to go straight ahead, with the uncertainty of whether you will emerge unscathed or not.

In my high school romance, there can only be a sweet boy who is an expert at making you smile, the ideal and unattainable subject for someone who did not lead a monochromatic life.

The simple fact of hearing that others say his name, is enough for a pleasant sensation, which extends until it is made to pass as endless inside me.

A knight like Kishō always seeks the best. It is about nothing less than a boy who appreciates his surroundings without measuring himself, enjoying being injured as a sign of having survived a complex event. It is difficult to assimilate that I could have such a wonderful person by my side, who made me smile until the end.


	2. 1

Empty rooms always have the darkest hues. Take a step forward or go back, what else matters? The result will sooner or later lead us to the same destination: death.

Where there is no fixed thing, will it be necessary to bet everything for a momentary happiness that later will bring repentance?

School is one of the worst places you can go. It is a prison with unfair rules, which limit your actions, repressing your thoughts. If you want to be heard, one of the requirements is to be popular so that they can engage in dialogue with you, or worse, you must be flashy and false so that your colleagues notice you.

Everyone knows it, if you want to escape from it you must go against the current. In order not to fall into that mistake, I will be a boy who does not care if people notice his presence or not, it will be enough to know myself and be aware of my actions. Someone worthy of admiration for ghosts, without needing any other person to be happy.

A contemplative joy where it is inevitable to smile for not belonging to such an unpleasant group.

My name is Inoue Tsutomu, I'm 18 years old and I'm in third grade in high school, everyone knows me for being the one who sits in the back by the window to admire the landscape, something quite relaxing for every human being. Resting like that is a gift while I do school activities.

Being a student is really tedious, I would rather stay at home, laying on my futon while I install a video game that will serve to entertain me later. Or cook something delicious that I will end up enjoying and sharing with my sister. Even the idea of working doesn't sound too bad, any option is nice, except spending it surrounded by people who speak to you for their own benefit.

My mind is kept with its full ingenuity, I feel the need to express my ideas although in the end I can only feel that it is absurd when others flatter the first of the class, whom they put on a pedestal; there is no place in the world for fairness. If you want to go far and be "recognized" you must also go through many injustices, in that case, what is the point of handling such cumbersome tools if it is something ephemeral?

The way they are applauded for both their successes and mistakes is impressive. But the failures of an insignificant boy are always remarked ad nauseam. If I analyze my situation, I am a person who walks aimlessly, I do not have a goal, I stay in a static hole and I become a human scum that lives by spending its time on useless things. That made it clear to me after seeing that it is the second consecutive year in which my colleagues forget my birthday.

For me it is not such a special date, however, being part of the class, it is expected that at least someone will come to give a congratulation. On the contrary, women and men found themselves surrounding the worst of all students: Takayama Kishō. Friendly, kind, smiling every day and with the position of student council president. It was not a great surprise, they brought him presents every day.

_**So irritating to watch.** _

❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀

It was time to leave, all the students retired to their respective homes. I tried to do the same, I would run home to rest and review the notes I made during class, nothing better than giving feedback after a comfortable nap, preparing myself to be productive at night.

By chance of fate that was not possible, I tried to cross the door and get rid of everything related to school slavery and the punishments of living with the rest of society, but that irritating boy was ahead of me, forbidding me to go any further.

"Would you give me permission? I'm trying to go home". I mentioned in a curt tone, letting him know that I longed to retire as soon as possible.

"It'll take a few minutes, okay?"

Why? I did not break any rules, why was the arrest? No that was not the important thing, why was she looking for something among her things?

In the blink of an eye, Kishō took out a small box, handing it over to me with great care, still smiling.

"Is for you." I continue speaking with that extremely masculine voice that did not finish convincing me; It was Kishō, the boy I hated, or so I wanted to believe ."I know that today is your birthday, I wanted to give you a little detail, Tsutomu."

"I thank you," I replied angrily, "but I don't want to receive what other people gave you."

"You are completely wrong!" I made that gift, I even wrote you something in a letter that I left you.

"And why do you think I'm going to believe you?"

Apparently she was not answering in a very pleasant way, because her reaction was to be perplexed by my question, until she decided to speak, showing a serious face:

"You always walk through the corridors, looking at the rest with indifference and smiling from time to time, however, when you think that nobody is paying attention to you, in your eyes a slight change is perceived when I'm around. I tried to find out more about you. As president of the student council I got the information easily, so I know that we met on the same day."

"Doesn't that make you a stalker?" I questioned.

"Sorry, it might be interpreted that way." Although I couldn't help but get closer, I realize you're not smiling inside, that worries me. I decided to give you a detail so that you understand that I want to have something with you; I don't want us to get along, you don't deserve to be alone. You are a good person, you should smile.

"Excuse me, today is your birthday and I was the only one who did not buy you a present, perfect sir," I replied with a tone of derision towards the one with long strands. I know everyone loves you, I will just say that I will not be part of your fan club. I appreciate the detail, but I won't be behind you, sighing like all those hypocrites.

He should say it. Although his honest way was somewhat aggressive, he wanted to make it clear that he hated following those crowds where they wanted to stab each other in the back.

"Tsutomu, read what the letter says, please." I will not stop you anymore, I hope you enjoy the gift.

Without adding anything else, he turned and continued toward his destination.

What had that been? On very few occasions did I get a chance to speak with him and when the opportunity arose, we discussed nothing but school matters.

Before heading home, I opened the box and took out the envelope to read the letter:

_"Dear Tsutomu:_

_My purpose is to write something short and direct, with which you can understand my true intentions._

_Lately, as a lot of people surround me like never before, I have witnessed in you a feeling similar to resignation. I can't stand idly by before it, so I wanted to know more about you. Among so many things, I noticed that your way of being is friendly, and taking advantage of the opportunity to express my thoughts to you, I will add that I have found uniqueness in you._

_It sounds like my life is based on stalking you, although that has led me to invite you. Please, let's spend the break on the roof tomorrow. Only then can we get to know each other properly._

_Also, I wanted to mention that you are currently the only one who knows my birthday. It is somewhat curious, since that will be a point to be discussed tomorrow. Don't mention anything about it, it's a secret._

_I will wait for you._

_Sincerely:_

_Your dear and loyal friend, Kishō. "_

Like a great wave of trouble, each word hit my face until I was completely stunned and shocked. Another present that I noticed inside the box appeared to be a luscious and adorable cake for one person. Judging by some details, like a piece of chocolate with his name on it, it showed that there was no lie in his words.

On top of that, he had to be careful from moving to keeping it intact during classes without drawing the attention of the crowd around him.Why did Kishō come to attack like that? I needed answers, instead, I asked myself more questions.


	3. 2

It was the first time that I attended classes eager to discover an answer as if by doing so I was going to obtain a reason to exist; no matter how much he thought about it, it was absurd to react that way. Even at my desk I felt the need to look at Kishō, wishing that this meeting would happen as soon as possible, however, as if his harassment helped him to read my mind, the one with the long hair stood in front of me, moving away from the blackboard by first time. In that place was Masaomi Banri, the vice president of the student council, who showed confusion as he gave up his seat.

Once seated, Kishō turned to look at me, he did so with a really maddening smile for my liking, as if he expected me to speak first. I shrugged and decided to back off a bit.

What was I thinking? No, I would never think of speaking to him, why did I have to take the first step? Going a little further would make you see that my interest is greater, when it is the opposite. It is true, that was the reason for my anxiety, I hoped to hear it and finish with that topic as soon as possible.

Did I really mistake my anxiety for emotion? If I thought about it carefully, regardless of the fact that at night I kept busy working hard, I managed to wake up animated for the first time, was he infecting me with his false happiness? Please no...

❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡

Immediately after the bell rang for recess, I went to the roof as requested in the letter, if I wanted to deal with a matter of that kind, it would be best to hurry to ask him to leave once and for all.

As always, when I was about to say the first word, he jumped on me to embrace me with emotion that not only prevented a proper talk, but ended up making me fall. Apparently he was not considering my short stature and weakness, as he kept putting all his weight on top. I began to feel a sweet fragrance emanating from it, something similar to the essence of vanilla that captivated by the softness of the aroma, painting a landscape comparable to sunset, all in a beautiful fantasy; I loved that smell, it brought back good memories.

"Tsutomu, I'm glad you're here." He mentioned aloud as he stood up and held out a hand to support me. "That means you really want to get to know me, right? I am happy as you cannot imagine."

I wanted to downplay everything he was saying, although it was impossible not to realize that this boy was exuding purity. It had to be direct, prolonging things could result in something negative.

"Actually, I want to ask you a few things."

When I tried to get up, I wanted to look at his eyes, but that look prevented me, they were a dark iris and nothing else, why was it that they made me make such a long pause and a gesture so normal for me?

"Ask? Ahead."

"Why the harassment? I understand that you want us to be friends, although it is strange to me that you have reached such a degree, I am insignificant, what do you want from me?"

"Which is what I want? If I respond to it, are you going to react badly?"

"Don't worry, I want to know the truth."

"I love you, is there something wrong with that?"

What was he talking about? I couldn't get another word out after that. It was a bombardment that blew my mind.

Maybe because of what he said, or because of the way he mentioned it, something had affected me, leaving my heart racing. If I said I was agitated from sleeping little, I would be hiding something else. That was devastating in a way, I chose a lousy question, although I couldn't think of a different one to help dispel my doubts.

Kishō was only playing with me, he understood the weight of his words and dared to enunciate a set of words in such order that it became enveloping. Without further ado, I screamed before running out of the place, hoping not to continue with that dialogue.

"For me it is! You come out of nowhere to leave me a letter in which you say that you are harassing me, you show a strange persistence and on top of that you hug me as if you've known me forever, who wouldn't feel confusion? I need you to understand, you're going too fast, Kishō."

What a surprise! I managed to be honest and without thinking about the matter. The satisfaction increased with each passing second, maybe I should have tried to be honest from the beginning.

Fortunately, I had some time left, enough to go back to the cafeteria and buy food that would satisfy my hunger. I walked through the hallways, trying to pick up my pace and be on time.

Maybe I was wrong at the beginning, I was not a bit lucky. I saw it with my own eyes. The cafeteria no longer had anything for sale, I was too late.

As if the situation couldn't be worse, behind me appeared Japan's number one stalker, smiling as if his life depended on it.

"Why are you follow me?"

"You said I'm going too fast, I'll try to slow down." That doesn't mean it's any further, does it?

"That's not an excuse, Kishō!"

"For me it is, I feel comfortable next to you. I will try my best so that you don't feel uncomfortable."

Again with the same, with those words so direct and sincere. I tried to look away, that way it would make it less obvious that Kishō was causing the redness on my cheeks.

A strange sound flooded me with grief, my stomach sent signals to receive food, however, there was nothing nearby, how would I survive such a sudden situation?

"Tsutomu, I made you something," said the jet "I figured we were going to linger on the conversation, so I brought food for both of us."

Kishō took a seat and began to discover the bento. He set the lid on one side and pulled out the chopsticks to hold a bit and raise his hand for my answer. I had no choice but to accept it.

Introducing the food was the best thing that could happen, although it was something simple, I experienced happiness because of how wonderful it tasted. Not only was he an attractive guy with a caring personality and good grades, he also managed to cook like a professional.

"You are an angel," I mentioned.

I took a seat in front of him and waited so I could consume some more. It was a matter of seconds to notice that that person was with a slight blush, was it for calling him "angel"?

That expression made my doubts dissipate, I had never met a boy as attractive and tender as Kishō.

Wait a minute, what was he thinking? No, I did not perceive it that way. Oh, maybe a little...

"You really are amazing," I said with a cheerful expression. "I really appreciate this detail."

"Do you think I'm amazing?"

For the first time, my stalker gestured with a kind of mix between grief and insecurity, so I tried to find out a little more about it.

"Of course. Does it cause you discomfort when I say that to you?"

"Not at all," he mused for a few seconds as he searched for an answer, after finding it, he looked at me in a different way, more seriously. I am happy about it. I was afraid I couldn't be enough for you, or that you would end up hating me. I can't believe I'm talking to you, it's all a dream...

_Stop, please, you complicate things..._

He felt the need to interrupt him and make it clear that it was not a dream. Deep down, he kept having those thoughts whose origin he did not know. Why couldn't I answer calmly without worrying about it? What was happening?

"You should just be yourself. If you want to achieve something and worry too much about it, you increase the probability of failure. Just see it as a goal, not a fear. I think my favorite writer would say something like that."

"Maybe your favorite author would say it, but right now it's just you ... It's a beautiful thought. I really admire you, Tsutomu."

_Why do you say it that way? I don't want to doubt what I feel right now!_

My vision suddenly became somewhat blurred, the whole place was spinning and I could not do more than put a hand to my face to cover it. A loud buzzing stunned me, as well as putting a painful pressure on my head.

It lasted a few seconds, the attempt to inhale and exhale consecutively helped to return to normal. However, when I removed my left hand from my face, I found Kishō quite close with a deep and different look than usual, as if trying to discover what was happening.

"Are you feeling bad, Tsutomu?"

It was a joke, right? It could be a rejection of his words, and he decided to assume that he was upset. Wow, I wasn't surprised.

"Don't worry, I was thinking what you said, I think you express yourself very sweetly."

"Oh..."

"What happens?"

"I think you're lying to me, Tsutomu."

There was no escape, how could I convince him? Wait a minute, what if I was honest with him?

I dropped my eyelids for a few seconds. Opening them, I extended my right hand to bring it up to the other's uniform and hold onto Kishō. I applied force to draw him to me fast enough to allow me to steal a kiss from his lips; act that was supposed to last a few seconds and ended up spreading.

When I walked away, I commented on it simultaneously as I got up from the chair.

"I wasn't lying to you, so give me some space, it's your fault I feel this way."

_Enough, enough, enough! Inoue Tsutomu, what are you saying ?! Don't be too quick to jump to conclusions about your own feelings!_

Unfortunately, I acted hastily so that he would not notice the discomfort, although I let that enigmatic feeling guide me to decide.

"Tsutomu..."

The harsh reality could hurt him, so I fled without explanation. I couldn't let him look at me with a completely flushed face. Never, that would be terrible.

I just didn't want to face him, it didn't seem true that Kishō was after me and I responded in that way...


	4. Chapter 3

A soothing fragrance began to spread throughout the room, a sweet and comforting memory flashed before my eyes and filled me with warmth from the familiar atmosphere.

As if her hair was composed of a fine and unique material, I took it between my fingers and stroked it smooth, facilitating the process of wrapping one strand with another until they were tightly intertwined repeatedly as a poetic act to give affection to Yui, my younger sister who enjoyed asking me to make a beautiful hairstyle with her long hair, which is why I always carried with me something to tie it up.

I was ready, she really looked like the most beautiful girl in the universe. However, that beautiful appearance turned into another person, precisely a stalker boy whose face was everywhere; no matter if it was a few meters or tens of kilometers ahead, I always found him.

The situation was going from bad to worse. The image I had of Kishō was getting sharper and sharper and it meant only one thing: for a while now he had been doing nothing but being under the effects of Morpheus and I hadn't noticed that I had unconsciously ended up combing his hair and even adding a refined touch with the ribbon I usually wore.

To make my lousy luck evident, the teacher advanced towards my seat with a rather serious look on her face, as if she was going to give the speech of her life for having overslept between classes, and for using the classroom as if it were a beauty salon.

"Professor, wait a minute, please." said Kishō as he stood up and let out a slight smile "I like what Inoue did, could you leave it at that?"

"He deserves a punishment, Takayama."

"I would like to be punished with him, I didn't ask him to stop."

What was he saying? He should never have mentioned that, and why did he look so relaxed if he was challenging a teacher so recklessly?

The answer came, there I understood that the word "sense" does not apply to my stalker and his environment.

"You are right, you emanate an incomparable tenderness, could I photograph you?"

The teacher used a cloying tone when she questioned him, had she really said that? Was she the usual grumpy teacher or was she still dreaming? What kind of nightmare was that?!

Why does everyone adore Kishō?!

"As you like, I thank you for changing your mind."

Kishō sat back down and turned a little to look at my wild expression, at the same time pinning his pupils and making me resume my seriousness. I felt something strange. I was trying to ignore the reasons why I was smiling out of the blue, but.... Why did I think I should only look at him at that moment?

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I was about to return home when the discomfort returned, I felt agitation all of a sudden and was trying to take deep breaths to neutralize the irregularities.

Kishō came from behind and grabbed my briefcase without warning; he loaded it in my place before commenting what I feared the most.

"I'll stay at your place tonight, I asked my parents for permission and I'm taking my pajamas with me."

"And you asked me?"

"No, I knew you were going to deny me, I know you. Besides, I was worried about you."

"It's okay," I answered, "but don't always be harassing me, sometimes my house is the only place where I'm allowed to escape from you."

"Don't worry, you can escape whenever you want, Tsutomu. But first you must give me a kiss like yesterday."

For all there is, what did I have against me! If I had known that this kiss was going to have such serious consequences, I would never have given it, even though it betrayed the discomfort that I had been carrying for three days and was getting worse and worse.

Speeding up my pace as much as possible, I ended up arriving at the door of my house next to Kishō. The strenuous walk zapped what little energy I had left and I ended up in a slightly worse state than I had when I left school.

We both went inside the house and left our shoes in the genkan. I didn't go into the house, before that I managed to notice the presence of someone else, and I couldn't think of anyone else besides Yui, who surely came home earlier.

Good timing, I had to take advantage of it.

"Yui, I have to go out, could you stay with Kishō?"

"Do you have to go with Momoka-san?"

"Yes, I have to arrive early today."

"Go, brother. Be careful!"

It was enough with his approval to go to my room and lock myself in for a couple of minutes while I changed my clothes and prepared in a backpack the clothes I needed for the expected meeting. I needed to endure the discomfort a little longer.

♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡ ❀ ♡

Dinner used to be the same every day with two brothers sitting across from each other. That night became the exception, as Kishō was like a momentary substitute, with a heartwarming presence.

"Takayama-nii?" called Yui "Who did your hair?"

"You can call me "Kishō". Tsutomu did my hairstyle, isn't it cute? ♡"

"Yes, he made me the same one when I was little. ♡"

"Ah, we were talking about the hairstyle?"

The eerie silence appeared and left a feeling of discomfort in both of them because of what they were talking about seconds ago.

"It's strange for my brother to come home with someone," Yui enunciated sadly, "I thought he didn't have any friends?"

"Why?"

"Tsutomu is always running away from people in a way, trying not to be fooled. Or at least that's what he wants others to see. He's a good person who has had very bad luck. That's why I'm glad he has a friend like you."

Both Kishō and Yui paused a bit long to give each other smiles for sharing that joy even though it was totally different.

Yui emanated a hopeful aura and it was probably due to Kishō, that light that had come to me without warning, sweeping a wave of positive attitude.

Kishō had no concrete explanation, possibly his harassment was getting to be cumbersome, and anyway he continued it without ceasing to care about me, someone so simple but with good intentions.

I couldn't help but have mixed feelings about him. I hated that, since there was a chance that he would end up distancing himself, something normal in human beings.

"I'm his friend, but soon I'll be his boyfriend, I promise."

He confessed at the same time that some little sparkles were coming out of his happy face, although it was apa gado with my younger sister's comment.

"Great! Although if you want to win him over you should accompany him to his work."

"Work? Tsutomu never told me about that, did your parents agree?"

"My parents died a long time ago, and our adoptive parents are not at home, that's why he works. He's very stubborn so I haven't changed his mind. Momoka-san invited him to work at a good salary."

"Wait a minute, his foster parents aren't at home? Shouldn't they be under supervision in case the family in question doesn't treat them properly?"

"It's a bit of a complicated situation, Takayama-nii, I think it would be better if my brother talked to you in detail about it."

"Well, give me a few minutes, I hope to catch up with Tsutomu? I could tell a long time ago that he wasn't feeling well, but I didn't know he would risk it to go to work."

He stood up and advanced to the genkan to put on his shoes as quickly as possible; he opened the door and walked out in a straight line without knowing where he was going. He had made a mistake right off the bat by going without knowing my work address even though he had the opportunity to ask for it.

As he accelerated his walk, he began to see me coming back with a slow pace. It was surprising to see that he was approaching, and that just at that moment all that tiredness that accumulated more with the "heavy" work of that day returned to me.

Before I knew it, I was extending a hand towards Kishō, asking him for help without knowing the specific reason, since I stopped perceiving sounds and my visual capacity was not giving for more; the whole place was beginning to be tinged with a deep black in which there was nothing but confusion.I had fainted, but my stalker was there, holding me in his arms and preventing me from falling to the ground.


End file.
